Well I guess I can officially say the Apple doesn't fall far from the tree…
I don't know why during my pregnancy one of my biggest worry was that Adelynn would have a hearing loss like me. It weighed on my mind forever. When she was born she passed her newborn screen with flying colors and I was relieved. I was relieved that she wouldn't have to struggle and to work extra hard at everything in life to get by. I knew in my mind that I wouldn't mind a deaf child because my parents paved the way for me and set the bar high. I would know exactly what I would do if that were the case….
Now I have a hard of hearing child… I would have never known in the beginning but it's become more and more obvious now that she's getting older. She has some language which is great… but not near where she should be. Adelynn got her 4th hearing test today… it was finally confirmed that she does have a significant high frequency hearing loss. The last test was the first time she really cooperated and I honestly went into the appointment thinking she would be fine…that she's only being stubborn. I walked out in shock that it was really the opposite. I felt like I failed her for some reason….that I did something wrong…that I didn't see it before…that I should have done better. It tore me apart because I don't want her to struggle. I want her to know her place and I'm still trying to find mine.
After the test this morning confirmed it, I wasn't sad anymore. I finally came to terms that things are going to be ok… because I turned out ok…thanks to my parents I know my next steps. I want Adelynn to be able to communicate orally, but also to know sign language because we live in an area where more of it is around and of course so she can feel like she belongs in both worlds.
I have my little girl who's going to ride this crazy life with me…. as my Dad said to me… maybe she was given to me for a reason….because I already understand. She's not alone in this journey of hers.
Adelynn is going to get her ear molds made tomorrow for her first set of hearing aids. Honestly I can't wait to see what a world of a difference it makes for her… to hear her learn to speak clearly and to be able to express herself more …to have less frustrations and tantrums… and to hear what she hasn't heard before. I can't wait to watch her grow and flourish even more than she already has.
I got your back Addie…. You are going to do great!
